Restraining Order
A restraining order is a tool that individuals can use to protect themselves from harm or harassment. In the context of family law, people often ask for restraining orders when dealing with domestic disputes or child custody battles. This means that tensions and emotions can be extremely high when managing or disputing restraining orders. There is always a lot at stake, and figuring out the best way forward can get complicated…fast.
The Lento Law Group brings the experience of a nationwide team of attorneys directly to you. Retain our premier services, and we can provide the guidance you need to feel confident and peaceful as you navigate the heady complexity of family restraining orders. Call our team today at
833.536.8652, and we’ll reach out in a timely manner to schedule your free consultation.
Defining and Understanding a Family Law Restraining Order
Technically speaking, a restraining order is a court order that restricts a person’s behavior to protect someone else from abuse, harassment, or threats.
A restraining order can include various, more specific instructions—such as prohibiting the person from contacting or approaching the individual the restraining order protects. They can vary depending on the case.
There are many types of family disputes and situations that may lead to restraining orders. Just a few include:
1. Domestic violence, or situations in which a partner or family member is being abusive to other members of their home
2. Child abuse or neglect, situations in which distance between two or more people is necessary to safeguard minors from harm
3. Stalking or harassment, situations in which individuals wish to protect themselves from ongoing danger, intimidation, or harassment
4. Threats of violence, situations in which individuals feel the need to place a barrier of protection between themselves and someone who has made a direct or indirect threat against them or their family
Whether you are in a place where you need to obtain a restraining order against someone else or you’ve been served with a restraining order, and you’re unsure of your next steps, the Lento Law Group is ready to support you as you work toward the best possible outcome.
What’s the Legal Basis for Family Law Restraining Orders?
In the context of a family unit or even an extended family tree, it can feel very odd and invasive for restraining orders to even be a legal option.
Remember: Even if your specific restraining order feels unnecessary (if you’re facing one) or even unfair, the purpose of restraining orders in general is extremely important. Restraining orders are meant to help provide immediate protection to people who are at risk of imminent harm. Just because a person is in a family environment does not mean they are inherently at risk of less harm. In fact, there are some types of violence that tend to happen most frequently between family members.
This makes it clear that restraining orders in family law are sometimes, unfortunately, necessary.
But what provides the legal basis for a specific restraining order?
Generally speaking, in order to issue a restraining order, a court will need to recognize that there is an immediate threat of harm to the individual who is seeking protection. The burden of proof, the specific laws, and the procedures for issuing and carrying out restraining orders will vary, depending on where you live in the United States. (For example, in some states, courts may handle restraining orders for domestic violence, harassment, or stalking differently than other types of orders, while other states may have a generalized approach to all restraining orders, regardless of circumstance.)
Since the legal basis for a restraining order requires some evidence of a threat of harm, the person seeking protection will need to make a case that another individual—in this case, a family member—demonstrates a credible threat to their personal safety. The person seeking protection will need to back up this threat with evidence, which can range from documentation of physical abuse to clear patterns of harassment or stalking.
Whether you’re the person compiling this evidence as you seek to request protection or you’re the person being accused, this will be a painful process. Restraining orders are meant to protect people from harm, and they do—but the process of getting them can result in significant emotional impacts on the people involved.
The Real Emotional Impact of Restraining Orders
While restraining orders are necessary and helpful for ensuring people’s safety, ignoring their emotional impact on all parties involved isn’t helpful. To have the best possible experience managing your restraining order, whether you’re the one requesting it or not, you’ll need to understand how to manage these emotional impacts.
The Emotional Impact of Restraining Orders for the Petitioner
We’ve seen the petitioners of restraining orders grapple with these tough emotions:
• A pervading sense of relief and safety. This one may make some sense: Initially, just after obtaining a restraining order, it’s common to feel lighter, happier, and more secure.
• Some very real emotional turbulence. As that safety and relief floods through your brain, it’s also common to feel tired, confused, or to suddenly start questioning your decision. You may feel afraid of the future. You may feel guilty about what you’re doing to your family or to the person you’re taking the order out against. You may feel sad or anxious, even as you feel relieved. This is all normal, and it does not necessarily mean that you made the wrong decision. If at all possible, it’s a good idea to talk to other family members, close friends, or even pursue therapy to help you remain as balanced as possible during this difficult time.
• Some equally real anxiety about the upcoming legal process. As we’ll detail in a moment, getting a restraining order isn’t easy. Gathering evidence, attending hearings, arguing your case, and anticipating future interactions with your family can all be very difficult. The Lento Law Group will be ready to support you as much as we can to help you achieve your sought-after outcome with minimal stress.
The Emotional Impact of Restraining Orders on the Respondent
If you’re on the receiving end of a restraining order, the emotions you feel will be no less confusing, and no less real. Here’s what we see clients struggle with after receiving a restraining order:
• Confusion and frustration. You may wonder where this restraining order is coming from. You may feel frustrated that your family member resorted to this external form of regulating your behavior. You may even feel angry, especially if you don’t feel that the restraining order is fair or justified.
• Fear. You may feel afraid of the future. You may wonder whether you’ll be able to see your family member again—or even family members other than the petitioner (e.g., children, siblings, in-laws, or even close friends).
• Emotional distress. Especially after the reality of your restraining order sets in, you may begin to suffer a sense of isolation, a sense of the stigma of being associated with a restraining order, and a sense of feeling restricted, depending on the specifics of the order itself.
If you’re the respondent, remember that if your restraining order is currently a temporary one, you may be able to take action to pursue an alternate outcome. The Lento Law Group is here to help you understand your options and move your case forward as strategically and successfully as possible.
However, know this: Until you are informed otherwise, you will need to start complying with the restraining order, even if it’s temporary, even if you feel it’s wildly unfair. If you are caught in noncompliance with your restraining order, that can lead to legal complications, which could influence your eventual, more permanent outcome.
Restraining Orders and Their Impact on Children
Restraining orders rarely impact just two people.
If there are children involved, restraining orders can get messy and charged very quickly.
Here’s what we’ve seen in terms of the impact of restraining orders on children, some best practices, and some things to be aware of:
1. A restraining order could have immediate restrictions on contact and could lead to updated arrangements in child custody. Depending on your current living arrangements and the stipulations present in the restraining order, you may experience an immediate disruption in your normal parenting routines. When you get to court, the court may also reevaluate custody and visitation arrangements. This will be extremely emotional for parents and children alike.
2. Any children impacted by a restraining order will experience a range of emotions similar to those experienced by the parents (if, in this example, the parents are the ones on either side of the restraining order). The children impacted by a restraining order will have questions. They’ll wonder what’s happening to their family. If they’re suddenly separated from a parent, they’ll be curious about what’s happening at the very least—and they may even start to feel abandoned or betrayed.
3. Children impacted by a restraining order may fear that their lives are about to change, and they may also fear living in an emotionally charged environment. Either of these situations can have a serious toll on a child’s mental health.
If you’re in need of strategies for protecting your children’s interest in the midst of a tense restraining order negotiation, consider the following:
• Pursue open communication. Keep the information you share with your children age-appropriate, but give them what they need to understand the situation as much as possible. Don’t add more confusion and anxiety to the list of emotions they’re experiencing.
• Maintain as normal a routine as possible. Your children’s lives will change, and it will be impossible to mitigate that fully; but, if you can, keep some facets of their lives, like their school routines or their access to their favorite media and toys, as consistent as you can.
• Seek professional support for your family. It’s better to be overcautious and get your children more resources, not fewer. If you can, consider asking child psychologists or counselors for help as you support your children through this restraining order process.
At the Lento Law Group, we understand that the stakes of a restraining order are inherently heightened when there are children involved. We will work tirelessly to help you pursue an outcome that is as helpful and safe as possible for you and your loved ones.
Next, we’ll discuss the basic logistical steps of both obtaining a restraining order and defending yourself against one.
How to Obtain a Restraining Order
Typically, to secure a restraining order against someone else, you’ll need to accomplish the following tasks:
1. You’ll start by filing a petition with your local court. This petition will need to detail your reasons for requesting a restraining order.
2. In many cases, you’ll be able to obtain a temporary restraining order quite quickly, as the court may see the need for you to have immediate protection while it sorts out your case and your paperwork.
3. You’ll need to attend a hearing. At this full hearing, both parties—you and the person you’re securing and order against—will present cases. At the end of this hearing, the court will determine whether a longer-term restraining order seems like a good idea.
Pursuing a restraining order can be stressful, particularly if the circumstances under which you’re seeking said order are scary or dangerous. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the prospect of obtaining a restraining order, don’t go it alone. Retain the Lento Law Group, and allow our experienced attorneys to guide you through the process.
How to Defend Yourself Against a Restraining Order
If, on the other hand, you are the subject of a recent restraining order, it’s important to know your rights and understand how to move forward as successfully as possible.
Your next steps may include:
1. Understanding the current restraining order. You’ll need to take time to read through the existing order, whether it’s temporary or long-term, to know what you are and aren’t allowed to do—as well as any cited rationale for the order. Remember that until you take action to overturn the order, if that is your goal, you’ll need to follow the rules of the order strictly. Doing otherwise will hurt your chances of achieving your ideal outcome.
2. Retaining the Lento Law Group. You will need legal support to both fully understand your order and plan your next steps. The experienced attorneys of the Lento Law Group are ready to provide this support.
3. Gathering evidence to support your case. After you and your attorneys from the Lento Law Group determine your best possible strategy, you’ll need to collect evidence that backs up that position.
4. Appearing in court. You’ll need to show up at a court date to present your side of the case. At the end of this hearing, the court will determine whether there is a need for a restraining order against you.
Of course, these series of steps—whether you’re the person requesting a restraining order or the subject of one—don’t always happen perfectly. Sometimes, the process of getting a restraining order or defending yourself from one is beset with unexpected challenges.
Common Challenges With Restraining Orders
Sometimes, engaging with the system of restraining orders can lead to frustrating complications. These complications or challenges may include:
• False allegations, or situations in which someone sets up a restraining order against another person based on claims that are exaggerated or flatly untrue
• An unanticipated impact on child custody or situations in which restraining orders can make it difficult for parents to see their children or take care of them properly
• Enforcement issues or situations in which making sure that people respect the conditions of the restraining order can be extremely challenging.
Whether you’re in need of certainty that the person you took the order out against is following rules or you feel that the restraining order taken out against you is unfair, you need to be aware that the road ahead will be difficult. Working with the nationwide team of experienced attorneys at the Lento Law Group is your best chance to ensure that you get the confidence and security you require going forward.
Are There Common Misconceptions About Family Law Restraining Orders?
Yes, there are. Since restraining orders are such a charged subject and can be issued for a wide range of reasons, there are some popular myths and misunderstandings about restraining orders that may not help the way you handle your upcoming restraining order processes.
These misconceptions may include:
1. Restraining orders are only for physical violence. This isn’t true. Physical abuse is a common reason for restraining orders, but these orders can also cover stalking, threats, harassment, and emotional abuse.
2. Restraining orders will instantly and completely resolve the central problem. This also isn’t true. Restraining orders may provide immediate protection and, therefore, reduce the risk of harm, but restraining orders are only one part of a broader solution to any problem that your family may be experiencing.
3. Restraining orders automatically ruin the respondent’s life. This doesn’t have to be the case. Restraining orders are not punitive; they are preventative. There are consequences for the respondent, of course, but in some cases, these orders can be modified with legal guidance.
What are the Long-Term Consequences of Restraining Orders?
If you’re the respondent of a restraining order, what are some things to know about that could apply later in life?
The implications of a restraining order aren’t limited to restrictions on your current behavior. In some cases, restraining orders can have lasting effects. These may include:
1. Impacts on your employment and professional life. If any professional licenses you hold require background checks, or if you’re looking for work, you may experience some challenges because of your association with a restraining order. These challenges could be as simple as you're not getting certified or obtaining employment. Or, in some cases, you may experience workplace restrictions.
2. Impacts on your personal and social relationships. Both parties involved in a restraining order may experience shifts in their relationships. Any family they share, for example, may not know how to relate to either party, and that can cause relationship drift. Larger friend groups or even communities can start to treat people involved in restraining orders differently, even subconsciously, which can lead to a different overall perception.
3. The impacts of legal disclosure. Finally, it's a good idea to know that in certain situations, you (as the respondent) may need to disclose your restraining order. This may be uncomfortable and could lead to loss of job prospects or rifts in new relationships.
If you’re looking for the best way to manage your restraining order now, understand your options, and set yourself up for the best possible outcome, you need to partner with the experienced nationwide attorneys of the Lento Law Group immediately.
Why Select the Lento Law Group as Your Partner for Navigating Restraining Orders
At the Lento Law Group, we understand just how stressful and sensitive working through restraining orders can be. Whether you’re in a situation where you need to obtain a restraining order or defend yourself against one, the stakes are only heightened when you’re dealing with members of your own family.
We’re here to help you move through this process as successfully and seamlessly as possible. The Lento Law Group is pleased to offer you:
• Nationwide reach: Wherever you are in the United States, we’re able to ensure you’re able to connect with knowledgeable legal assistance.
• Personalized legal strategies: We don’t embrace a one-argument-fits-all approach. Instead, we’ll tailor the way we support you to suit your specific situation.
• Complimentary consultations: Reach out to our team today, and we’ll take time to learn more about your case and discuss what your first steps would look like without any initial commitment.
The Lento Law Group is available to start supporting you right now. Call us at
833.536.8652 for timely assistance. Our team of experienced nationwide attorneys looks forward to helping you navigate the labyrinthine world of family law restraining orders.